April 24, 2023

Hi there! Did you spend some time this weekend doing something just for you?

I started reading a fantastic book called The Gap and The Gain, and it explains why we experience so much unhappiness in our lives.

We're constantly comparing ourselves to other people and measuring our progress based on how far we have to go to reach our goals rather than appreciating how far we've come in our lives.

The GAP is the space between where you are and where your ideal is.

The GAIN is the space between where you started your journey and where you are today.

Yes, it's great to have goals and to feel inspired by them, but how often are we not allowing ourselves to be happy right now because we haven't reached our goals just yet?

No matter what you're trying to accomplish right now (weight loss, business success, retirement, relationship improvement, or another big dream), can you focus on the progress you've already made and celebrate that?

Look how far you've come!

You can choose to love the life that you're living right now while also being excited about where you're going!

When we fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to external standards and ideals and we're constantly fall short, we lose the joy of living.

We never arrive.

Instead, if you can decide what success means to you personally and move toward that, you can be happy now.

I measure success based on the amount of love, joy, excitement, and appreciation that I'm experiencing on a daily basis, but I often forget my own definition of success and adopt society's view of success.

That's why I've been so overwhelmed lately.

I've been chasing what other people told me I should chase in order to find happiness. 😜

Do you really want to measure your success based on how many friends and followers you have on social media, how much money you have in the bank, and how many expensive "toys" you have?

Or, do you want to decide that success means living a happy life regardless of what you own or what other people around you are accomplishing in their lives?

The best piece of advice I've ever received in my life is from Abraham Hicks.

Abraham says to "stay in your own lane".

Don't worry about what anyone else around you is doing.

Don't worry about what they have.

Don't worry about what choices they are making.

Live your life in your own lane and decide what measures of success you want to move toward every day.

You can choose to live in the GAP where you never measure up or you can live in the GAIN where you celebrate all that you've become and everything you've accomplished in your life so far.

I'm celebrating you and the incredible things that you've created in your life as I celebrate my own beautiful life. 🎉❤️

Much love to you,


P.s. I highly recommend reading The Gap and The Gain to learn more about how to experience true happiness by living in the GAIN. You can buy it here if you would like to gift me with a small commission at no extra cost to you. I am an Amazon affiliate who only recommends books and personal development products that I personally own and love. ❤️

If you missed my letter Overwhelmed?, you can read it here.

You can read my next letter External Validation here.

You can connect with me on Facebook at facebook.com/amberkissler33.

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